Hi. Remember me?

It’s been over three weeks since my last blog post and there were only a smattering of posts throughout the summer. So, you may have forgotten what I look like.

For my first summer as a blogger, I’d give myself a solid C- overall.

Consistency = D. The goal has always been once/week. This summer it was once/2-3 weeks.

Effort = C. Because if I’m honest (and I always am - unless I’m throwing you a surprise party in which case I’m a surprisingly good liar, especially considering I don’t get much practice), if given a choice between spending an afternoon at the pool or writing at my desk….well, what desk?

But lest you feel singled out, my avoidance of work this summer was an equal opportunity offender. I chose summer fun over paying bills, doing laundry, entering dates into my calendar, cleaning my shower, or putting my suitcase from our June vacation away. Pretty much “adulting” was off the table.

As I mentioned in this post, I blame my kids. (Just kidding! Kind of.)

They were all home. All day. Every day. So, all of my energy was spent driving them around, refereeing sibling battles, and negotiating snack/quiet/screen/bed time. Not only did I struggle all summer to find pockets of uninterrupted time for writing, but my mental exhaustion resulted in zero clear thoughts in my brain for the entirety of the three months.

That’s not to say I haven’t been thinking about you, my friends and readers. You’ve faithfully encouraged me each step of the way and I’d often think, “I wonder how they're doing. I should write a post about this situation because it's so funny and they could use a laugh.”

And then, I’d think, “I’ll do it tomorrow.”

And tomorrow I thought, “I’ll get it done by the end of the week.”

And the end of the week came and went and suddenly that blog’s situation was no longer relevant or funny and life moved on.

But, know that you matter to me and this community matters to me and to many others. We’re authentic around here and that’s why I can say:

I dropped the blog ball this summer and I’m sorry. I've missed writing and I've missed you.

So, here’s what I learned in the process.

1.       Have some blog posts ready before school gets out and the kids stare at you with puppy dog eyes asking what you’re going to do today. Because once they’re home, it will get much tougher to write.

2.     On the other hand, some days you just need to shut the office door and let them fend for themselves while you write. Two hours of boredom will not kill them. In fact, it might remind them that mom is more than a wish granter and adventure planner.

3.     Summer is equal parts wonderful and brutal.

I love having my kids home and enjoying extended time with them. I cherish days with nothing on the schedule, no rushing through dinner or going separate ways.

But, after the busyness of the school year, we jumped right into a lot of togetherness. By July, I realized my foggy brain wasn't clearing. In fact, I was getting foggier, tireder, and more scatter-brained.

Michael called it: Relationally Fatigued.

Too much talking. Too many questions. Too many people. At the end of the day, I didn't want to think or talk or even make eye contact, let alone conversation.

So, I didn't. (Michael's such a lucky guy.) I tried to be as engaged as possible with the kids all day and then my brain, mouth, and heart shut down at 8:30 pm. Done. Finished.

Returning a text felt like a monumental task. I needed a serious girls' night out, but couldn't organize one more play date, even if it was for myself.

In my next post (guaranteed to post in less than three weeks!), I'll let you know how I got my writing/thinking/relational groove back. But, in the meantime, thank you for your grace and support as I'm working out the kinks of this new adventure.

As my wise therapist, sister-in-law is fond of reminding me, "I've never done this before."